I'm back!

After 2 weeks of frustrating technology issues and a quick vacation I am back! I did not falter from my weight loss, I am still on track, I just couldn't seem to get my technology from freezing up and my wifi was doing crazy things. Last week I maintained my weight, but I know I lost inches because I could fit into an old pair of skinny jeans I couldn't the week before. When the numbers don't change, it's frustrating, but at least it shows in my clothes.

Here are the results from this week:

 From last week I lost 4.8 pounds for a total of 24 pounds. We have gone back to Kings Island several times. I will have to lose a whole lot more in order to fit in my final weight loss goal: fitting onto the Diamond Back, my smaller goal is to fit on the Banshee. I am so close! I expect 10 more pounds down and I will be able to fit.

Good luck with your own personal weight loss endeavors!

Weigh in day!

Ladies and gentlemen...here are the results...

This week I have lost 1.6 pounds for a total of 19.2 pounds!!

Yay!!

Weight debt

Today I got on my computer and looked at my total debt. My husband and I both have student loans, a few scattered credit cards and my husband still has a car payment. We decided to make a conscious effort to work on getting rid of our debt. All in all, it's pretty hefty but nothing we can't manage. As I sit here reflecting on our monetary debt, it reminds me of our physical debt we get ourselves into with each pound we gain. We spend the money we don't have to enjoy pleasures of the present instead of ensuring stability in our future. In the same way, we eat calories that we know we won't be able to sustain. We don't exercise to "pay" off the debt we've accumulated that day, and then we turn around a year- 2 years- 10 years later and we wonder how we got to be this way.

I'm sure there are some people out there who are the perfect weight AND have no debt. And I'm super jealous of them. I need to find one of them to be my life coach. I really would love a life coach. Is there really such a thing?


If any of my readers are a life coach, hook me up. I need life help.

Weigh in day

Guess what...

I had a nice loss this week! I am down 2.8 pounds from last week, and a total of 17.6 pounds! I feel good! Tomorrow I am getting pictures taken, and I am starting to feel a difference in how my clothes are fitting. The weight is coming off rather slowly, but like I said before- this is a lifestyle change, it's not a diet. I am altering the way I eat for life, not trying to get down to the lowest number I can get to and then scratch my head and say, "now what?"

My neighbor told me yesterday she could tell I had lost weight. She asked me what I was going to do to reward myself when I got to 20 pounds down. I kind of laughed at her. I know I have worked hard, but not as hard as some of you bloggers out there! I read some of your blogs and you have consistent losses every week. You persevere and you make no excuses. Here I am, every other day writing about how I cheated. ha! It's kind of humorous to think about treating myself.

 So this is what I've decided to do, after 30 pounds down I am going to get a pedicure, so all you dedicated bloggers don't have to look at my nasty toenails on the scale anymore. I consider it a community win.

Pictures tomorrow!!


Good luck with your weight loss endeavors. You motivate me more than you know.

Wrapping up the week

Tomorrow is weigh in day! I feel good! I have stayed on my diet plan and made an effort to exercise every day. I think the work will speak for itself. My friend can't take pictures tomorrow, but we've arranged for pictures on Tuesday. I think I'll start taking pictures once a month instead of every week. I think the change will be more noticeable that way. Not much to report today, hope every one has a good week!

Good luck with your weight loss!

Sister sister...

Today is one of those pensive days. My endeavors for health and weight loss are on a nice cruise control this week, I feel as if I am doing well. I took a sneak peek at the scale this morning (bad Paige...) and I was happy to see the results thus far in the week.
As I sit here thinking about what to write about, my sister pops in my head. She and I have been struggling to keep close the past few years, mainly because she is constantly working or doing things for other people, and because I moved 5 hours away. One thing we have been able to bond over is these essential oils she gave me. I don't go into it too deeply, because I'm not trying to sell anything on here. However, I am writing because through these last 2 months as I have been striving for weight loss, I have now turned to strive for being healthy and fit. I want to treat my body and mind well. I want to live a nice, long life with J by my side. He keeps things interesting. If you are into all this aromatherapy stuff, you should check some of the oils out. I like diffusing them, I think they are helping with my stress level, and I really do feel better on the days I diffuse them around the house.





I really like diffusing Joy, Purification and Valor around the house. It's nice for a little pick-me-up. If you're not into aromatherapy, then just disregard this part. I guess I'm a hippie at heart.











Anyway, my sister doesn't know about my blog to date, so I'm not trying to get on her good side. (However, if you do get on her good side, she will make you dinner, and she is a VERY good cook!)

As I sit here reflecting on weight loss throughout life, a period of time comes to me when L and I were on college. I was gaining weight at a rapid speed, and had just started to be at the point where I was going to have to start wearing plus sizes. I already have no fashion sense, and I had no idea how to pick out clothes that looked good on me. One day during summer break, my sister approached me. She wanted to take me shopping. I remember that most of the clothes in my closet were either too small or too big. I had very little self-esteem, and I felt like I looked like Shamu (which is interesting, because I weigh a good 70 pounds more NOW than I did then. Perspective- it's somethin, ain't it?)

I was resistant at first, because my sister was tiny- she took care of herself. Now, you women out there with a few extra pounds- do you like going shopping with women who are small and look cute in anything? If you're anything like me, the answer is no. I guess she was persistent, because I did go.

It was one of the funnest experiences I've had shopping. My sister had several opportunities to criticize the things that I put on. She could have made jabs, and inserted in the conversation how things looked SOO good on her, but didn't on me. But she did not do that- not even once. She picked out clothes for me that she thought would fit, analyzed them after I modeled them for her, and then gave her advice. She was gentle, she didn't criticize. My weight didn't come up. She would look at me, and if she didn't think what I had on looked flattering on me, she would find something else. She doesn't know this, but that day meant more than a million bucks to me. She was patient, uplifting, and gentle.

L, I love you, and I think you are one of the most beautiful women I have ever met, inside and out. One day, you will read this. When you do, please know that you are an inspiration to me. You are the best sister anybody could have, and you mean more to me than you will ever know. Thank you for lifting me up when I was down.

Good luck with your weight loss endeavors this week!

 Here is a picture of L and me in my grandparents' RV. We were so young and cute. L is on the left, I am on the right.

Loveland Bike Trail

Today I tried out the Loveland Bike Trail. I think the whole bike trail runs over a hundred miles, and goes from North of Columbus down to the Ohio River. Eventually I would like to make it all the way down to Downtown and back, but that's over 30 miles.

This is where the bike trail passes through Loveland. It's beautiful! I didn't go far today, just scoping it out. Another phone app I love- My Tracks. I love it! I just pushed play when I was about to start my bike ride, put my phone in my pocket and took off. Here is a picture of my route:

I really enjoy my new bike riding hobby!

Healthy life = happier life

I have to admit that when I am eating healthier, I feel healthier. I also am expecting for my lower back and my knees to ease up soon, but they're still hurting after rough days. I enjoy waking up without a foggy head, and sleeping so well at night. It's been wonderful. Now, if only I could get that high from exercising like everybody talks about then we'd be doing even better! I can exercise all day and I still hate it.

What a great day!

I work today, and then I have 3 days off. I think I'm going to try something new as far as exercise. Any suggestions? King's Island Amusement Park is open. I thought about going there and walking around the park for an hour or so, it's so sunny and nice out. I thought about going on a riding path as well, we have one close to my house. Apparently it's almost 50 miles long. I bet that would be fun to explore that on my bike! I hear that they also have kayaks for rent along the Little Miami River. I think that would be a lot of fun, however, I'm not sure I want my first kayak experience to be alone. I don't even know HOW to kayak. Anyway, the day is young! Any suggestions?

Weigh in day

So this week wasn't my best. I think I kind of obsessed on that this week with my posts. I learned a lot about myself this week. First, I seem to have very little self-control. Now, in my defense, I have a very rough time on my cycle (Sorry male readers). I get emotional and it's hard to talk to me, and in a way I guess it's even hard for ME to talk sense and reason to myself during this time. Just some thoughts to ponder.
Second, I require a strict routine. When there is no strict routine in place, I start to get bored and cheat. I like to stay busy to keep my mind from wondering to food. This is where I am going to have to work hard to stay on track. There is absolutely NO WAY that circumstances will allow me to stay on a strict routine 100% of the time. Life happens. Things happen. It will be hard, but it is important for me to learn how to adapt.
Third, when I'm cheating, and being tempted I do not blog as much. Perhaps it should be the other way around. When I am doing well, I should blog, but when I'm not doing well, I should blog even more! I need that sense of accountability.

Reflecting on your bad points is the birth to personal enlightenment. Some people don't like to concentrate on their bad points, but how else will you grow? You have to know why you do certain things in order to be able to change your behavior.

Anyway, I bet you thought I was rambling so that you would forget it is weigh in week. Not so...here goes...

There you have it ladies and gentlemen. I have no idea how but I have maintained my weight, despite all the bad foods I ate. This week begins a better journey into weight loss. This week there will be a loss.

Good luck with your own weight loss endeavors.

Back on track

After a few days of making poor dieting choices, I am back on track. Although I expect I will have gained weight this week, I am not going to let this discourage me. I am going to continue to eat healthy, and continue to plow through. Poor J has had to fend for himself these last few days while I was at my conference. He didn't get his breakfast, and had to fend for himself for lunch until I got home. He could have easily gone back to how he use to eat, because no one was monitoring his consumption, but he did not! I'm so proud of him. Good job, J.

Enjoying the weather

Work has me beat. I haven't had much to contribute and because of this conference I've been thrown off my routine. This is not an excuse, and I will take credit for any fallbacks I have this week. Hope everyone is doing better than me.

And I built a fire and now it's raining. Just about right.

Why am I doing this anyway?

Everyone at work is required to attend a conference called "Reigniting the Spirit of Caring." Today was my first day, and this is my kind of conference. Today we talked about how each of us are important, and how to love ourselves. The conference will eventually go into how to become a better co-worker and then slyly elude how to become a better employee, but today they gave us rose-colored glasses and yelled, "Love thyself!"

One thing our counselor covered was that each of us are important, and therefore we deserve to take care of ourselves. We deserve to put ourselves first, then family and other things second, because if we don't take care of ourselves first, we can't adequately take care of anything else. They dipped into the important of diet and exercise (secretly I wondered if this was a ploy to decrease our insurance premiums, but who knows).

If anything, today reminded me that I am doing this healthy lifestyle thing for a reason. I want to be fit. I want to be healthy. I want to do things without being worried about my size and weight. I don't  want to sit in a room and secretly wonder if I am the biggest one there. I want to be proud of myself.

Today is fat Tuesday: J lost 2 pounds. We are on a roll!

Weigh in day!

Today day is weigh in day, and the results are:

I am down 1.4 pounds from last week for a total of 14.8 pounds. I'm not losing very fast, but at least I am still losing. I understand it is by my own doing that I am not losing as fast as expected. I chose to up my calorie intake so I wouldn't get bored on my diet, I choose not to exercise like I know I should. Honestly, after traveling and reducing my water so drastically I'm thankful to have lost at all.

I forgot about the pictures. (sorry!!) Maybe I can take some later today. I hope everyone excels at their weight loss endeavors this week! Good luck!

On the road again...

As we drive into the Cincinnati city limits, I reflect on how sedementary I was this weekend and hope it does not reflect on the scale tomorrow. Pictures are being taken tomorrow as well.

Welcome to Nashville, y'all!

Nashville has always been home to me. It's always good to come back. Yesterday on the road went fine. I had packed enough healthy snacks that we didn't even really get hungry for lunch. I didn't get hardly any of my water in, because if I drink too much we have to stop too much.  We brought all 4 dogs, and it's still to be determined if I'm going to pull all my hair out. They are bad dogs on roadtrips.

Dinner went well, we grilled some chicken and boiled some green beans. Mom was kind of funny, she kept trying to get J to eat more. After dinner, she offered ice cream which J can't turn down. We calculated how many calories he could have which turned out to be a cup of vanilla ice cream. My mom gave him a huge bowl. I started to protest, but mom scolded me.

"Let the boy eat." She said.

Southern women are so bossy.

Here is Luna, our oldest. She looks sweet, but she is really planning her next move to run away or pee on something. They all turn into bad dogs when we take them on roadtrips. Unfortunately, our dog sitter AND backup dog sitter were gone this weekend. So here we are.

Travel experiment #2

Today J and I are headed to Nashville to visit my family. I think we'll be fine with our foods, my whole family are chronic dieters. We are all trying to lose weight. I already called my mom and let her know we are doing our own thing. The drive up and the drive back are the times when I see a problem. Although, now that J and I are both on diets, maybe it won't be that big of a deal. We'll have to see. I'm glad, however, that my family is accepting, and will do anything to help us stay on track. Hopefully, we can get a little exercise in while we're there, too.

New recipes

It is officially grilling season! Until I really figured out how to get this calorie counting down to a science, I have been eating meals that have exact calories. I am always a little nervous I will  cook something and get the portion size wrong, or use an ingredient that will bring the calorie count up. Now that I am getting a little more familiar with portion sizes, and how to use my calories wisely I think I'm going to start cooking. Last night we got some turkey burgers and grilled them. I thought they were delicious. We put them on low-calorie pita bread, which was not so delicious, but I can try to figure out another alternative.

I'm really starting to get this down, and I hope know that through perseverance, and a little help from my friends I can continue to be successful in my weight loss endeavors.

By the way, J is doing really well, too. However, he feels like he is in food prison. He is 11 pounds down. Go J!

Work schedule conundrum

First of all, let me say I only work 3 days a week. I am spoiled. However, my job is chaotic. I am an RN on a critical care unit that is constantly busy. You never know what patients will be admitted, it is not uncommon we work short handed, and some of the patients can be very sick. Some days, there's just no way I'm gonna get lunch. I know this because there are days I quite literally don't sit down. My usual shift is 11:30 to midnight. I love this shift, because I can wake up about 8am, eat my breakfast, get to work a little early and eat a snack and then I'm usually good for a while. After management leaves I can eat out on the unit, so then I only have to wait until 5 before I can eat again. My eating schedule when I work 11:30 to midnight is like a well oiled machine.

However...

When I work 7:30am to 8:00pm, all bets are off. I get up at 5 and eat breakfast, and then, (for instance, yesterday) I don't eat again until 3. The next chance I get to eat is then after the shift is over, around 8:00. Yesterday did not go so well. I reverted back to the old Paige. I was so hungry when I left work that I was convinced I was going to cheat.
   
 "Just this once," my bad angel said. Then, the good angel on the other shoulder said, "yeah, actually she's right. You've done really well so far." So I went for it. I had a ton of calories left, so I don't think I blew it too bad- although I know I still went over for the day.

Anyway, I guess the whole synopsis of the journal entry is to tell you I cheated on my diet with fast food yesterday.

There I said it.

Shopping for a bike

A few weeks ago, I bought a new bike, and I love it! One of my favorite cardio workouts is riding an  hour on my bike. I must have made J jealous, because yesterday he said he wanted a new bike, too. J did (at one time)  have his own bike, but it was "adopted" by the neighbors across the street. As far as we know they are taking good care of it. It's kind of humorous actually. They asked to borrow it, and it never came back. J is too nice to ask for it back. Plus, this is an excuse to buy something new and shiny. Something both J and I have a tough time turning down.








We spent the day going from store to store looking for the perfect bike. Several stores didn't have a great selection, but we finally found one that fit J's fancy.













As soon as we got home, we both went on a long bike ride and enjoyed the nice weather. After the bike ride, we warmed up our dinner and build a fire in our chiminia.

The fire was not featured in this picture. It was shy and refused to get its picture taken.









Spring is finally here! What a great day!

Weigh in day

Today was weigh in day! No pictures were taken to today, because I worked day shift and had to be up well before the sun was up. My friend who takes my pictures was several hours from getting up when I left for work. However, I did snap a picture when I was on the scale:

Like my collage abilities? Thought you would. This week I lost 1.8 pounds- 13.4 pounds total. Way to go me. Anyway, I am tired and am now going to bed. Good luck with your weight loss endeavors!

My Dream

Last night I had the strangest dream. I dreamt I was super skinny, but that I had to get all my parts tacked up because I had lost so much weight and they were all saggy and I had lose skin. But in my dream I was smokin'.  I was on a cruise ship, in a tiny little bikini and everywhere I went all the boys stopped and gawked at me. My husband was nowhere to be found. I'm not sure I recollected I was married in the dream. (Don't tell J.)

I am a very modest person. Even if I lost a whole bunch of weight, I'm not sure I would be able to don a bikini and prance around. Anyway, this dream made me laugh, because a few years ago (when I was not dieting, or doing anything to lose weight) I dreamt I was on a cruise ship and I had accidentally packed my sister's bikini instead of my one piece, and had to walk around with a bikini on. In this dream, everybody stopped and laughed at me. I remember being embarrassed in my dream, but my subconscious self made no attempt to hide my body. I just walked around in that bikini, mortified. That makes me laugh. Two interesting dreams- almost identical.

Eating healthy makes me weird.

Preparing for Easter

Every year, our neighbor invites practically the whole church congregation over for a pot-luck lunch and a HUGE Easter egg hunt. Then, after the Easter egg hunt we sit on the couch and talk, and laugh until time for dinner. When it's dinner time she makes waffles. She's done it for years. It's become quite the tradition every Easter. This year I already decided that I'm just going to bring my own food. At some point in my lifestyle change I'm going to have to start incorporating other people's food into my regimen but I'm just not ready for that yet. My husband on the other hand is struggling a bit. He's already brought up the fact that he wishes he started his diet after Easter twice now. I told him that if it really bothered him just to eat the waffles, but I think he feels guilty unless I do it, too. But there will no cheating for this girl! I'm staying on track. Besides, it's not the waffles that call out to me. It's those delicious Cadbury Eggs. I know that Easter is all about Jesus, but I'm pretty sure those eggs are from the devil.

My dear friend

I finally did something that I wasn't planning on doing until I had lost a significant amount of weight. I told a friend about my blog. I'm just not sure I'm ready for my friends and family to know about it yet. This particular friend is very dear to me. We met in college, but I'm pretty sure our spirits have been friends for much longer than that. She's such an encouragement to me. The day before yesterday, we were chatting on the phone, and catching up. I was telling her about my weight loss endeavors and because it's her, I went ahead and just told her about my blog. She would completely accept me if I weighed 2000 pounds, so who cares if she knows I weight 279. As for the rest of my friends and family, I'm keeping it under wraps for now...unless they just happen to stumble across my blog websurfing. That would be quite impressive.

Sweet Tooth

Today I did something a little daring, I bought some sweet breakfast items. I usually buy a Jimmy Dean frozen breakfast sandwich. They are good, and most are under 250 calories! I really enjoy them. But yesterday, I was plagued by my overactive sweet tooth. I was thinking about what I could have that would satisfy it without going over my calories. That's when I saw them...the toaster strudels. There were some in apple, and some in pumpkin pie. They are 180 calories a piece, strudel and icing total. I bought them and opened my first one up this morning. They are tiny! I went ahead and ate it, but I know I will be hungry again really soon. It did satisfy my sweet tooth, but I can remember when I was a teenager eating 2 of those for breakfast. That's over 300 calories ( for those tiny things!), plus a glass of milk. I feel better now that I am watching calories. It's interesting to see what I use to eat that got me into this mess in the first place.

Fat Tuesday

As I had said before, my husband has joined my efforts to lose weight. He's already pretty skinny, but he's trying to lose his gut. He says he has 75 pounds to lose, but I can't figure out where he's going to lose it from. Anyway, I weigh in on Mondays and I asked him when he wanted his official weigh in day to be. He thought about it for a minute, and then said, "Tuesday. Then we can call it fat Tuesday!" I thought that was clever. I've decided to take some time and go Easter dress shopping today. Hopefully I won't look like a big cow like I always feel I look. Although I have lost 11 pounds, I have a looong way to go. Hope everyone has a good day.

1200 calorie diet

I was thinking about my calorie app yesterday- Myfitnesspal. It says that my recommended calorie intake is 1200 calories. I sat there and thought about my diets before. I have always tried to stay under 1200 calories and it is impossible for me to try and not cheat. On the first day of my calorie counting, I plugged in my weight, and then saw what my recommended calories were- 1200 calories popped up again. I sat down and thought about how dedicated I was to stay under 1200 calories. I'm not. I don't want this diet to fail so I tweaked my calories. I now have to stay under 1800 calories which doesn't seem that hard to do at all! It's actually pretty easy. I always come in between 1500-1700. I understand that as I lose weight it would probably become easier to continue to see the numbers drop as I curb my calories. When the time comes, I will address it. I am quite happy with my 1800 calorie a day diet for the time being. What do you guys think?

Weigh in #3

It's weigh in day! That means picture day... let's see how I did...

Not a huge loss...but I'll take it. So to date the weight loss amount is 11.6 pounds. I would like for it to be more, but that's all completely up to me. I've not exactly done a great job getting out there and hustling.

Now picture time...the pictures this week were not very good quality because I did not turn the flash on. In hindsight I should have, but my friend and I were chatting and not paying very close attention. So, with no further adeu...my pictures for this week:

For some reason I'm leaning to one side a little. Not really sure why. Anyway, no real change yet. Maybe some weight down in my face and neck.

 I think my profile is getting a little smaller. It's still hard to tell.

Again, I'm leaning to the side in this picture as evident by one back fat roll being larger than the other. What is my deal?? Oh well. The flash would have picked up the butt fat nicely. Unfortunately, there are none today. I did notice that my skin on my arms is a little flabbier. Is that from the weight loss or am I doing something weird with my arms. Why am I taking these pictures again? I thought I was suppose to start looking better...not weirder! Oh well.

Yesterday...

My husband and I were able to spend a rare day at home yesterday. It's rare that we get to spend the whole day together, but we were able to do that yesterday. We both held each other accountable for the foods we ate, and we both came in under our calorie goal for the day. I'm pretty excited. One thing I've noticed through this weight loss is that I sleep A LOT better at night. I use to toss and turn, waking up every few hours. Now, I literally close my eyes and don't open them again until the alarm wakes up. Even when the alarm wakes up, I am able to get up and get movin'. Yesterday I tried to exercise by riding my bike but it was freezing outside...literally! I did 15 minutes on the bike but at that point I couldn't feel my face and hands.

Today is the last day before weigh in tomorrow! We'll see how I did....

Back on track

Today I went back on track. I'm not even sad about it. I have my bad food desires out of my system and am looking on into the future. The future where I reap the benefits of my good decisions. I weigh in on Monday, and the husband weighs in on Tuesday. It's kind of fun that we are both doing this diet. I don't think that "J" (my husband) wants to do this diet forever, but he's trying to get his weight down so he can shave some time from his run time. He said he would give it a month to see how much weight he looses. He says he wants to lose 75 pounds, but I don't know where it'll come off. I thought he was maybe 15 pounds overweight.

I got on the scale and I weight exactly what I weighed last Monday, so I think hopefully even though I cheated I will still loose weight this week.

Hope everyone else is doing good, and have gotten all their cheats out of their system.

I fell off the wagon

Today I fell off the wagon for the first time since I've started my lifestyle change. I was in a class for a new piece of equipment all day, and I did not have a microwave to warm up my meal. Instead, the company hosting the class got us all barbecue. I tried as hard as I could to be good, but I was starving by the end of the class at 4:00. When I got out, of course traffic was horrendous. I was frustrated, had barely had anything to eat all day and just decided to have McDonald's for dinner. I should have fought it harder but my bad angel won this time. I do regret it, but I'm really not that upset about it. As long as I contain the damage, I think I will be alright. Tomorrow is another day.

Rough week

This week has turned out to be a little rough. I have been very busy with work, and a few of those days at work were stressful because my patients were getting very sick. On top of that I have agreed to teach home schooled seniors Anatomy and Physiology next year. I think that will be a lot of fun, but becoming certified to teach a co-op is actually taking a lot more time than I thought. I worked on Monday, got home at 2 am, crashed, went back to work Tuesday, stayed till 2 AM, crashed and then had to wake back up on Wednesday to go to the co-op for a meeting with the director. I know it may sound like there are plenty of chances to sleep in that schedule, but between trying to get my menus scheduled and made, get my husbands menus scheduled and made, take care of the dogs, get to the store, etc., I was just exhausted yesterday. I opted for a 2 hour nap instead of working out. I actually stayed on my diet and didn't stray-I even got all my water in! However this was the first day in a while that McDonald's french fries popped in my head.  In spite of the diet, I just could not make myself exercise. Do you ever have weeks like that- where it feels like you just don't sit down? I hope it doesn't haunt me when I step on the scale Monday.

My Fitness Pal

Remember how I said that I didn't like to count calories? Well, I don't...but I recently discovered My Fitness Pal app for my phone. It actually has a bar code scanner. You just scan the bar code of your item and it adds it to your diary!!























Now, come on...even I can do that!! I have been using this app for a few days now and I really like it! Are there apps that help with weight loss that I am missing? What is your favorite weight loss app?

Return to sender...

I thought at the beginning of my weight loss that it might be a neat way to stay motivated to write letters to myself after each 10 pounds lost. The day before I started my diet, I sat down and typed these letters, one to be read at 10 pounds, another at 20, etc. The 10 pound one I opened yesterday.

Yesterday, I thought that perhaps the letters were kind of stupid. However, after I opened it and read it- truly read it and thought about what I felt like WRITING that letter, it made me smile. I really like my idea. Of course the letter is very short because I didn't exactly know what to write myself, but it is heart felt.

Oh, and something I never thought would happen...the husband has started my diet with me. It'll be fun!!

Weigh in # 2

It's that day of the week again...Weigh in day!! Let's see how I did...

This week the scale says:

Woohoo!! That's another 3 pounds down for a total of 10.6 pounds!

And now the pictures. I was able to figure out how to make side by side pictures finally:

My front may look a little smaller. My face has gotten skinnier.

I obviously didn't do a good job of actually turning to the side on my first photo, but I think I've lost weight in this picture, too.

It's THIS picture that has me depressed. I don't look like I've lost any weight at all. In fact, I've added an extra back roll in there. How did that happen??

At least the scale shows a loss. 

Tweaking my diet

So tomorrow is weigh in day, but I thought I would take a quick peak at the scale- just to see what it says. It only says I am down half a pound, which concerns me. I feel like this at this point in my weight loss I should still be losing 3-5 pounds a week. I was thinking about my diet, and perhaps I am eating too many calories. I know in my prior posts I have commented about how I hate counting calories, but maybe I should just count them for a few days and make sure that I am not eating some crazy amount. The other thing I thought is that I lost 7 pounds last week, plus I had my time of the month this week. Maybe those 2 things have something to do with it. Who know. I'm gonna get out there and exercise today and maybe that will help drop an extra pound or two tomorrow. Weigh in day and picture day tomorrow!!

Girl Scout Cookies...What is their deal?

It's that time of year again...Girl Scout Cookie time! As I was leaving the store last week, a little girl scout, probably around 7 years old stopped me and asked me if I would like to buy a few boxes of Girl Scout Cookies. I simply told her I was on a diet, and was not interested in any cookies. The little girl made a sad face. I don't like when little kids look sad (I'm such a pushover) so I told her I would buy a box for my husband. I got over to the table and 2 moms were handling the money. I bought a box, and something inside me just snapped. I proceeded to tell the mothers that selling girl scount cookies in the spring when everyone was starting their diet is cruel, and that if they really wanted their sales to skyrocket to start selling them in the fall, when everybody is eating bad anyway because of the holidays. The moms just laughed at me and agreed. I didn't really mean to be funny, but oh well. I gave the girl scout cookies to my husband. He ate them so fast I never had to be tempted by them. He looks out for me like that.

Reminiscing ...

Yesterday I was sitting in my chair watching TV when I started thinking back on some of the reasons I wanted to lose weight. One among many reasons happened not too long ago. I was working at the hospital, it was around 5:00pm, and the doctors huddle in the unit around this time. Now, we are only a 10 bed unit, and if you say anything louder than a whisper, everyone- patients and personnel- in the unit can hear you. The huddle consists of all the residents, medical students and the attending. There were probably about 7 doctors present, and 4 other nurses besides me. I had just gotten a patient in and settled, and was emptying one of his drains. The patient sat straight up in bed, startling me, and I guess I squeezed the drain a little too hard because I jumped, changed the flow of the output and it got all over my scrubs. I calmed the patient down and tried to clean off my scrubs the best I could-but it was obvious I would need new scrubs.

I went out into the unit where the charge nurse, "D" sat. I love D, she is good. She is also loud and not able to read her surroundings all that well. I asked D to call the custodian to deliver me more scrubs. So D gets on her walkie talkie (they're called Voceras, but unless you work in health care you may never have heard of them. They are just like walkie talkies) and called the custodian. The Vocera was turned up so loud that several doctors turned around to stare at her to see what was going on. D told the very loud walkie talkie that Paige needed new scrubs.

"What size does she need?"
Me: "Um...(trying to whisper)...how about 2x...
D: "That'll be a 2x." (more of the doctors turned around to see what was going on behind them.
Custodian: Well, I'm out of 2x. I don't think she could fit into a 1 x, so I'll grab a 3x for her.

The custodian was not trying to be mean, he was just thinking out loud. This time everybody turned around and stared at us. I'm sure there were several people looking my way to see if I was in fact, too big for a 1x. I shrunk back into my patient's room and waited for the scrubs. Then, to make matters worse, the 3x was just a little too small. But you better believe I wore them around like they fit just right. I was not ABOUT to ask for a 4x.

Thank goodness I can laugh about this story now. I was mortified when it happened.

Exercise is important

I have got this lifestyle eating under control. I really haven't felt that eating this way is hard. It's pretty easy. It's the exercise that's KILLING me!! I KNOW I need to get up early to go walk, but I'm not a morning person, and the room is so cold in the mornings, and I'm so warm under the covers. I have not been bad as far as my afternoon workout as far as starting them, but I tell myself to exercise for an hour and quit after a half an hour. It is self-control. It is discipline. Here I am writing like I don't know why this is happening, but obviously it is happening because I'm not trying hard enough. I wish I liked exercise! My husband loves to run. I wish I had that same drive. We'll see what the sale says at the end of the week amid this whole exercise dilemma.

What I eat

I've not been counting calories, although I'm sure I should be. I just hate doing it, and I only last for a few days before I think, "screw it." I've really been focusing more on eating healthy and getting more fruits and veggies in. For breakfast I have been having:

Breakfast
Fruit smoothie (made with fresh strawberries and blueberries and light soy milk)
a low calorie Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwich (about 230 calories or something like that)
a cup of coffee sweetened with splenda

Snack
Orange
Granola Bar (calories range but I try to keep it around 100 calories)

Lunch
Salad
weight watcher meal

Snack
100 calorie yogurt
frozen veggies (keep under 100 calories)

Dinner
weight watcher meal

I know I will probably have to start cooking my own lunch and dinner soon, but I just love these little meals. They range from 150-300 calories and are so easy!

help!

Hope this post turns out ok. My internet is down so I am writing this post on my phone. Earlier this year, before I got serious about weight loss, my husband and I decided to renew our King's Island membership. It was not unreasonable to buy the mealplan, which included 2 meals inside the park. Well at the time it was no big deal. Now, I am a little nervous about it because everybody knows the food in an amusement park is anything but healthy. I checked the Web meal plan and it does cover an antipasta salad from La Rosa's, but there's not much else that is healthy. I know nobody reads this blog, but if you just happen to pass through please share some ideas with me! I don't want this meal deal to go to waste.

Weigh in #1

Today was weigh in day!!! And the results are:




First day





Week 1




Down 7.6 pounds baby!! Wow!! (and it wasn't ALL from the socks). I am out of the 290s, and I will never see them again!!


 

I'll have to figure out how to put these pictures side by side, but for now, they're just one on top of the other:

Beginning



 week 1


                   
 beginning

 week 1                                                                                  

 

 

beginning:

 

 

 week 1                                                 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These pictures are obviously hard to compare because I can't figure out how to make them sit side by side. I will have to investigate so that I can actually put them side by side next week. There's not much of a difference this week so I'm not too concerned about it.                           

Wrapping up the week

I am really doing much better than I thought I would this week. I really thought at this point I would have cracked. There were a few times that I had to make some last minute changes to snacks and meals because I would not be able to eat otherwise, and I didn't  even use it as a cop out to have to eat unhealthy (i.e. driving through McDonalds on my way to Knoxville because I wouldn't be able to eat what I had planned while driving). I actually am really proud of myself, and believe it or not, it makes me want to continue to eat healthy! Who knew, some sort of closed loop satisfaction:

I eat healthy--> I want to continue to eat healthy--> I eat healthy

I honestly have never done so well this long, literally not straying from my diet once. I really hope this is a new change for me.

It was the pictures...I knew they would work! You can't look at your butt head on and not want to lose weight!!

Back to Cincinnati

Well, yesterday I came back from my quick trip to see family. Again, I was afraid that I would mess my diet up, but actually I again did really well. I really want to go a whole week without completely blowing it. I saw a post in someone else's blog about overeaters anonymous (OA). I really want to check it out. I got on their website to look at their meeting places and there is one in my city!! I really am thinking about going. I think it would be awesome to get some face-to-face report from someone who isn't one of my friends who would say, "oh, well. That's how life goes sometimes. You were going good you deserve a break" if I went on an eating binge.

By the way, why is it that when someone goes on an eating binge, people just kind of laugh and go on. If someone fell off the wagon when they were battling with heroine everybody would be very distraught. I want my friends and family to be distraught if I gain weight. My poor husband, he would totally get onto me if I wanted him to, but after 2 years of being married to a fatty, he is afraid to say anything. He knows that in the past it hurt my feelings. He doesn't necessarily care about my weight, but he is skinny and he likes to do outside sports stuff, and I always feel self conscious, so I can never do them. Therefore, we always end up spending time together by going out to eat. (Or at least we did before I started this lifestyle change). Recently we got a Xbox One Sports Kinect. We actually do that together and have a lot of fun. I love that game.

My first traveling experience

Yesterday I left for Knoxville to visit my family for a short stay. I was kind of afraid to travel because I thought McDonalds French Fries would magically appeared in my car. Somehow, I managed to refrain and did pretty good, actually.  My aunt and uncle spoil me to no end so of course they took my to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse last night. We didn't even start eating dinner until 8:30pm and of course I wasn't going to not eat at Ruth's Chris, so I did have to cheat on my diet rules a little. I also may have had half a plate of fried Calamari, and a big ole steak. But I ordered asparagus instead of fries and stuck with water to drink. Doesn't that count for something???

Getting My Water In

One of the hardest things for me with my new lifestyle change is getting in more water. The first biggest issue I encountered is "how much water should I be drinking a day?" I did some research, and everybody said something different (of course). Some said 8-8 oz. glasses of water a day. Some experts said to take your weight in pounds, and divide that  in half to get the number of ounces you need. Others said to not half your weight, but that you should drink 1/3 of your weight in water. Although there was conflicting data, somewhere between drinking 1/2 to 1/3 of your body weight in pounds converted to ounces seem to be what most experts were saying.

So I started trying to convert my weight to oz. and divide by 1/3, but I just kept getting frustrated. I hate having to do so much work to just figure out HOW much water to drink- I haven't even started the work of drinking it all yet! But then...I found this app. It ROCKS! It's called HydroCoach. It's a free app you can download onto your phone from the appstore:

I LOVE this little app! It calculates how many ounces of water you need to drink a day, and you can chart them with a few pushes of a button. It will even yell at you if you want! I don't like it chiming in every hour telling me to drink more water, so I turned it off.

As for my diet, yesterday went well. The biggest struggle (besides the water) is not eating after 7pm. I get off work at midnight, and was hitting up the 24 hour McDonalds down the road from work probably 2 or 3 times a week. I LOVE McDonald french fries. Anyway, my body got into the habit of eating around 11 or midnight. Now, my body is chiming in right around 10pm saying, "hello?? Aren't you going to feed me?" I know that the more I change my diet, my body will soon adapt. But I still am tempted by those McDonald french fries...

Day 3

Yesterday was a good day. I was pleased that I was able to maintain my diet while at work. I brought my lunch, dinner (I work 12 hour shifts) and healthy snacks. I ate only what I brought despite all the yummy candy that was laying around. I started making myself a fruit smoothy in the mornings and I really like them!
I was telling my coworkers yesterday that what I am doing is not a diet. It. is. a. lifestyle. change. Right now I'm not eating out, or eating anything extra that's not on my diet because I know it'll trigger my impulse to eat and I may just fall off the wagon.
I purchased a book on tape about food addiction. Listening to the book, they compared food addiction to food compulsion. I definitely think I could actually have food compulsion. The beginning of the book was barely able to hold my attention. "I already know all this stuff!" I thought! The book went over the basics....very basics. But as the chapters continued to ramble on, a lot of good information came through. Did you know food can illicit the same type of dopamine release in the brain as an illicit drug can in drug addicts? Who knew!
The book states that a lot of people, though they may be unconscious of it, turn to food because they feel lonely and get this- eating a certain kind of food (i.e. McDonalds french fries for me)- can actually stimulate the same areas of the brain that is stimulated when they feel like someone loves them!
When these pathways in the brain get use to that feeling after eating a trigger food, the brain correlates food with pleasure. Therefore, when you are sad, depressed, stressed- the brain thinks you need food to feel better - and the brain can actually try to convince you that you are hungry! The book states there are ways to train yourself to be able to tell whether you have actual hunger or compulsive eating. I may post those tomorrow, I'm still listening to that portion of the book.
The best sentence in the book states: Food DOES NOT love you back! Interesting....


The book I referenced is Food Addiction: Conquering Your Addiction Successfully; How To Get Out Of The Clutches Of Food Addiction For Good by Petra Ortiz

Yesterday was not so bad! I stayed on track, only ate what I planned to eat and didn't eat after 7. I also went on a 3 mile walk/jog (mostly walk) and then another mile walk last evening. I'm feeling good! I'm trying to decide whether to weigh every day or once a week. I have read literature that says DO weigh every day and some that says DON'T. What are your thoughts?

Today is the day. I'm starting my new lifestyle, and ending my dieting days. Today, I am making a change. I am tired of losing weight and then putting it back on and then some. I have been busy reading everybody's weight loss blogs, and some bring tears to my eyes. I bet hitting maintenance is a feeling you can't put into words.

Today I got on the scale and saw this:

(Yes, I am aware that my socks don't match)

Yikes!! When did this happen?? To be honest, I breathed a sigh of relief I hadn't hit 300 pounds yet. Although, I'm not too far from it. But not anymore! I'm losing it!!!

First thing I am going to do: I am going to change my diet. I am going to eat 6 small meals a day. I am going to be conscious of my fruit and vegetable intake. I am going to steer clear of fatty foods, and watch my portions. As for exercise, I am going to job/walk two and a half miles in the morning and then do some form of exercise, whether walking or riding my bike in the evenings.

I have also decided to include some pictures, to really get me motivated. Yikes, I can't believe I'm posting these, but it's important that I realize how I look. In a way, I feel like there's no way I could be this big. But the pictures don't lie.

I know I have a really silly grin on my face. This is me trying to act cool, while getting a fat picture taken. How is one's face suppose to look?

You know what's funny about this picture? When my friend took it the first time, I sucked my gut it. I made her take one again with it all hanging out.

And ladies and gentlemen, there you have it. My rear end, sticking out there for all to see. How embarrassing. Please be nice to me, and don't leave really mean comments. For being 29 years old, I sure do have a plump rear end. I'm planning on losing it!!














And finally, my goals. I think that my ultimate goal would be that I want to be able to fit on the Diamondback. The Diamondback is a roller coaster at King's Island that was build in the 1970s before they were concerned about fat people being able to ride these rides. Therefore I cannot fit on it. Thankfully, I was not asked to get off the ride. The ride has a tester seat in the front, and it was pretty clear I was not going to fit.